This past week as my daughter and I drove to the supermarket, I was dwelling on Galatians 5:13 which says, “For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another.” This led me to consider fresh ideas for service, pondering how to better give of myself for His glory. One moment later, I was presented with a unique opportunity to serve another individual.
We pulled into the parking lot, opened the car doors, and were greeted by an elderly woman who inquired if we would like her cart. I quickly and rather kindly responded, “Oh, no thank you! We plan to use a basket today!” Cheerily, I walked to the trunk to retrieve our shopping bags and then stopped dead in my tracks. I thought to myself, “Oh my. That poor woman! She doesn’t want to take that cart back herself! What was I thinking?” I rushed back over, helped her put all the groceries in her car, had a lovely chat, and returned her cart to the store.
Did you catch why I initially declined helping her with her cart? Because I wanted a basket. I didn’t need a cart. I had planned to use a basket that day. I could not see past my own plan to the need of another individual.
Do you ever find yourself making lists of things to do? I love lists. I even use an application on our computer that posts little “stickies” on our desktop. That’s how much I love lists! I find they help me to stay on task. There is just one problem with my list-obsession.
If you’ve ever read the Frog and Toad books by Arnold Lobel, there is one particular story called, The List. Toad loses his list of things to do and is quite upset, but he will not chase after it because it was not on his list of things to do. The story is absolutely hilarious, that is until you see yourself in it! Are we not also like this? We govern and plan our days, leaving little room for how He might want to orchestrate divine appointments for His glory and our good. I was so set on using a basket that I couldn’t see the need right in front of me. Perhaps the illustration seems trite and silly, but I pray these verses do not:
“This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.” (Psalm 118:24)
*Each detail of every day is within His sovereign care. He makes and orchestrates our days. This means that He both holds and brings interruptions – they are catalysts for His glory and our good, even for our growth!
“As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God’s varied grace. Whoever speaks, as one who speaks oracles of God; whoever serves, as one who serves by the strength God supplies—in order that in everything God may be glorified through Jesus Christ.” (1 Peter 4:10-11)
*We serve each other with the strength He gives us, not of our own strength. And our service is to bring glory to Him. Above any list or plan for the day should be our desire to please and glorify Him.
The other day I read a prayer for Christian women by John Piper. He prayed, “My earnest challenge and prayer for you is that you be totally committed to ministry, whatever your specific calling; that you not fritter away your time… that you redeem the time for Christ and His Kingdom.” I was challenged as to how I view “my time”. Now this is not to say that we all don’t need time alone and to ourselves, because I think we do. Being an introvert by nature, if I was around people all the time, I just might combust. But here is my main point:
*We need to be constantly aware and attentive to the needs around us. We need to be dependant on Him and not ourselves to meet those needs. We must remember that our days are His and we are to be obedient to what He places before us. Yet we must also understand this: our obedience is only possible by the strength that He gives us through His Spirit. He feeds His sheep; He feeds the multitudes. Our every ounce of energy and endurance comes from Him.
The challenge is simply this – ask for open eyes and a spirit that is dependent on Him, not on your own strength. And, guard your life from idleness. Be active at putting others before yourselves, serve your families, and do not be selfish with your time and gifts. Our lives are really not our own. Our lists must always leave room for changes.
“For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another.” (Galatians 5:13)
Friday, April 16, 2010
Bridging the Gap of Disconnect
I can listen intently, take thorough notes, and have maximum motivation for implementing truth into daily life. My challenge is acting. I’m sure you’ve read about me in the book of James. I’m the person who listens well, stores up knowledge, but when the time comes to use it, I casually, yet often deliberately chose to forget it. I’ve been known on occasion to even run the other way.
I’m challenged by the following verses: “But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks intently at his natural face in a mirror. For he looks at himself and goes away and at once forgets what he was like. But the one who looks into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and perseveres, being no hearer who forgets but a doer who acts, he will be blessed in all his doing.” (James 1:22-25)
Do you find it slightly astonishing, perhaps even appalling that we choose to walk away from being blessed in all we do? The passage clearly states that the one who looks at the law and perseveres --who acts-- will be blessed in all he does. So, what is it that causes me to retreat when I’ve received such specific marching orders? Am I lazy? Careless? Clearly, I am a sinner. How I need to be more attentive, more diligent in allowing Scripture to penetrate the depths of my heart and mind.
Consider James 1:19-20: “Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger, for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.” I shout an “Amen” in my head when I read this. Yet shortly after, I find myself doing exactly the opposite. I find myself voicing and acting on my annoyances and irritations rather than displaying patience and love. I choose to look at offenses and hold people to them rather than overlooking them. (1 Peter 4:8) How can I believe something so strongly and yet live so contrary?
I believe it starts here: God is holy and I am a desperate, needy sinner. Only He can do this work in me, and only His behavior and His heart are worth emulating. Only His law is worth writing on my heart. And sometimes it’s a good idea to write it on all the walls of my house – to post it everywhere, lest my feeble mind forget it. My heart is deceitful above all else and cannot be easily trusted. I need to be constantly in His Word, training myself in truth, storing it up not just to know but to also use it. There must be application through the strength I receive by His Spirit.
I want His Word to be the morsel I long for and acquire. I want Him to be the refuge I run to not only when I’m needy, but also when I’m angry, when I’m disobedient, when I need forgiveness, when I need humility, etc. I want to spend more time in His Word and more time acting on it.
Proverbs 3:3-8 states, “Let not steadfast love and faithfulness forsake you; bind them around your neck; write them on the tablet of your heart. So you will find favor and good success in the sight of God and man. Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make straight your paths. Be not wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord, and turn away from evil. It will be healing to your flesh and refreshment to your bones.”
Refrain from anger and practice kindness. This type of love does not come from being wise in my own eyes; it comes from being wise in Him. I can acknowledge Him in how I display kindness to others and in daily circumstances. And how amazing to think that through this, I can receive healing in my bones, straightness to my path, and refreshment amidst a sin-sick world. I resonate with this.
I want to live faithfully. I don’t want to see a hypocrite or a liar when I see the reflection of my own heart. And, I know that only His Spirit and His Word can change me. This takes discipline and diligence. I cannot afford to be lazy. I can’t be so foolish so as to not care or not make it a priority. His Word is not motionless; it is living and active. I don’t want to be at a standstill; I want to see His Word living and active through me.
Titus 2:11 states, “For the grace of God has appeared, brining salvation for all people, training us to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in this present age.”
Let’s not sit at a standstill – let’s allow His Spirit and Word to transform us.
I’m challenged by the following verses: “But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks intently at his natural face in a mirror. For he looks at himself and goes away and at once forgets what he was like. But the one who looks into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and perseveres, being no hearer who forgets but a doer who acts, he will be blessed in all his doing.” (James 1:22-25)
Do you find it slightly astonishing, perhaps even appalling that we choose to walk away from being blessed in all we do? The passage clearly states that the one who looks at the law and perseveres --who acts-- will be blessed in all he does. So, what is it that causes me to retreat when I’ve received such specific marching orders? Am I lazy? Careless? Clearly, I am a sinner. How I need to be more attentive, more diligent in allowing Scripture to penetrate the depths of my heart and mind.
Consider James 1:19-20: “Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger, for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.” I shout an “Amen” in my head when I read this. Yet shortly after, I find myself doing exactly the opposite. I find myself voicing and acting on my annoyances and irritations rather than displaying patience and love. I choose to look at offenses and hold people to them rather than overlooking them. (1 Peter 4:8) How can I believe something so strongly and yet live so contrary?
I believe it starts here: God is holy and I am a desperate, needy sinner. Only He can do this work in me, and only His behavior and His heart are worth emulating. Only His law is worth writing on my heart. And sometimes it’s a good idea to write it on all the walls of my house – to post it everywhere, lest my feeble mind forget it. My heart is deceitful above all else and cannot be easily trusted. I need to be constantly in His Word, training myself in truth, storing it up not just to know but to also use it. There must be application through the strength I receive by His Spirit.
I want His Word to be the morsel I long for and acquire. I want Him to be the refuge I run to not only when I’m needy, but also when I’m angry, when I’m disobedient, when I need forgiveness, when I need humility, etc. I want to spend more time in His Word and more time acting on it.
Proverbs 3:3-8 states, “Let not steadfast love and faithfulness forsake you; bind them around your neck; write them on the tablet of your heart. So you will find favor and good success in the sight of God and man. Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make straight your paths. Be not wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord, and turn away from evil. It will be healing to your flesh and refreshment to your bones.”
Refrain from anger and practice kindness. This type of love does not come from being wise in my own eyes; it comes from being wise in Him. I can acknowledge Him in how I display kindness to others and in daily circumstances. And how amazing to think that through this, I can receive healing in my bones, straightness to my path, and refreshment amidst a sin-sick world. I resonate with this.
I want to live faithfully. I don’t want to see a hypocrite or a liar when I see the reflection of my own heart. And, I know that only His Spirit and His Word can change me. This takes discipline and diligence. I cannot afford to be lazy. I can’t be so foolish so as to not care or not make it a priority. His Word is not motionless; it is living and active. I don’t want to be at a standstill; I want to see His Word living and active through me.
Titus 2:11 states, “For the grace of God has appeared, brining salvation for all people, training us to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in this present age.”
Let’s not sit at a standstill – let’s allow His Spirit and Word to transform us.
Monday, February 8, 2010
Her Eyes
I am a dreamer by night, not usually by day. I have dreams of people and places, decisions, emotional dreams, spiritual dreams. I have dreams of my Mom.
This has happened many times before, but is often infrequent, perhaps similar to how my thoughts are of Mom from time to time. It may sound strange to the reader, but just as friends disappears from your everyday life and you don’t think of them as much, so does my Mom disappear from my thoughts quite often. She is not always on the forefront. Yet she is so deep within me that when I leave her presence, I often cry for the rest of the day.
Back to my dream. There she sat in her wheelchair and I next to her, longing for something more than her closed eyes and clutched hands. Some kind of communication. Some type of exchange. Then, something different happened. I saw her again, standing above her frail body, looking down upon herself. Healthy Mom, expressive Mom, talkative Mom, eyes-looking-at-me-Mom. There she was. And she looked at me and smiled, as if we hadn’t seen each other in such a long time. It was almost a look of pride, of affection, of all I hope to see in her when I visit. I was moved. And then she looked down and saw herself. She was almost shocked, saddened. She looked at me, trying to understand. I stared back at her puzzled eyes, and then I woke up.
I kept my eyes closed for a while that morning, staring at her face till I could not longer see it. I held on, trying to get back in that dream to perhaps have a conversation or just to look at her eyes again. But instead I was reminded of life now, of my dear husband next to me in bed, my daughter in the next room, and the day about to dawn. I was reminded of Mom’s reality. And I was reminded of the goodness of God to each of us in that reality. He has been so kind.
I told my sister the other day that I never miss Mom more than when I see her now. It’s painful. It’s all that I envisioned it to be. It’s the staring at blank, closed eyes. It’s the seeing her body change so drastically. It’s the watching saliva drip down from her lips and knowing her diaper needs to be changed or nails need to be trimmed. It’s the not having her know my daughter. It’s the not being able to pick up the phone and call her just to chat. It’s the missing her laugh and voice and tenderness. It’s that and so much more.
But I’m thankful for the dream for through it I remember her again. I want to dream a little more. How I miss her! How I miss those early Alz days when she was the most precious person you’d ever come to know. How gracefully she’s handled Alzheimer’s, by the grace of God. How He’s sustained her! And I know He sustains each of us. And I see how He’s working in our family because of Mom’s Alz. He is sovereign, faithful, and so glorious.
Far better than having her look into my eyes is knowing that one day soon, she will behold Him and see Him in all His glory! Even so, “Come, Lord Jesus!”
This has happened many times before, but is often infrequent, perhaps similar to how my thoughts are of Mom from time to time. It may sound strange to the reader, but just as friends disappears from your everyday life and you don’t think of them as much, so does my Mom disappear from my thoughts quite often. She is not always on the forefront. Yet she is so deep within me that when I leave her presence, I often cry for the rest of the day.
Back to my dream. There she sat in her wheelchair and I next to her, longing for something more than her closed eyes and clutched hands. Some kind of communication. Some type of exchange. Then, something different happened. I saw her again, standing above her frail body, looking down upon herself. Healthy Mom, expressive Mom, talkative Mom, eyes-looking-at-me-Mom. There she was. And she looked at me and smiled, as if we hadn’t seen each other in such a long time. It was almost a look of pride, of affection, of all I hope to see in her when I visit. I was moved. And then she looked down and saw herself. She was almost shocked, saddened. She looked at me, trying to understand. I stared back at her puzzled eyes, and then I woke up.
I kept my eyes closed for a while that morning, staring at her face till I could not longer see it. I held on, trying to get back in that dream to perhaps have a conversation or just to look at her eyes again. But instead I was reminded of life now, of my dear husband next to me in bed, my daughter in the next room, and the day about to dawn. I was reminded of Mom’s reality. And I was reminded of the goodness of God to each of us in that reality. He has been so kind.
I told my sister the other day that I never miss Mom more than when I see her now. It’s painful. It’s all that I envisioned it to be. It’s the staring at blank, closed eyes. It’s the seeing her body change so drastically. It’s the watching saliva drip down from her lips and knowing her diaper needs to be changed or nails need to be trimmed. It’s the not having her know my daughter. It’s the not being able to pick up the phone and call her just to chat. It’s the missing her laugh and voice and tenderness. It’s that and so much more.
But I’m thankful for the dream for through it I remember her again. I want to dream a little more. How I miss her! How I miss those early Alz days when she was the most precious person you’d ever come to know. How gracefully she’s handled Alzheimer’s, by the grace of God. How He’s sustained her! And I know He sustains each of us. And I see how He’s working in our family because of Mom’s Alz. He is sovereign, faithful, and so glorious.
Far better than having her look into my eyes is knowing that one day soon, she will behold Him and see Him in all His glory! Even so, “Come, Lord Jesus!”
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)