I came across this article today and really enjoyed it. Hope you do, too... even if just a few lines. Well-suited for the theme of this blog.
http://www.realsimple.com/work-life/life-strategies/inspiration-motivation/makes-me-feel-beautiful-00000000017777/index.html
Friday, July 31, 2009
What's to Come
There she lay on the hospital bed, asleep, quiet, and might I add – beautiful. How can dying look so beautiful? It can. I assure you, it can.
Her death was not imminent, as in the near future, but it reminded me just how close it really is. She was having a very difficult day with a bladder infection and feeling very uncomfortable. And, yet seeing her lay there made us all realize – we’ll all be in that hospital room again, watching her lay on the bed, preparing for those final moments.
It’s odd to say that she looks more like my Mom when sleeping. I’m sure it’s hard for you to understand that, also. But, her eyes have not looked the same to me in a long time. And when I saw her laying there, eyes closed, resting – she looked just as if I walked into her bedroom years ago to wake her up to chat or play. She looked like all that I remember. Gorgeous. Dreaming. At rest. Healthy. Excited to see me.
What struck me even more was that she was resting. And, how I long for her to have eternal rest with our Lord. As much as I love seeing her, enjoy her presence, and don’t want to let her go, I long more for her restoration. Most of all, I long for His glory, and if that means more time for her here to accomplish His purposes, I readily agree and accept.
I came across a box of letters and photos the other night, and inside were three letters from my Mom. S walked in the room to find me in tears. I said, “I don’t even remember her anymore.” The letters were fragrant with her love, her fun spirit, her humor and sensitivity. And, they were lavished with her love and concern for me. How I miss that! How long it has been since I’ve sensed that or heard such things from her. And, yet I hear her in some things I say to my girl now. I’m reminded of her ways.
Alzheimer’s is so very long. It tarries. The clock ticks slowly. Come, Lord Jesus. And, remain our steadfast comfort till the end.
Her death was not imminent, as in the near future, but it reminded me just how close it really is. She was having a very difficult day with a bladder infection and feeling very uncomfortable. And, yet seeing her lay there made us all realize – we’ll all be in that hospital room again, watching her lay on the bed, preparing for those final moments.
It’s odd to say that she looks more like my Mom when sleeping. I’m sure it’s hard for you to understand that, also. But, her eyes have not looked the same to me in a long time. And when I saw her laying there, eyes closed, resting – she looked just as if I walked into her bedroom years ago to wake her up to chat or play. She looked like all that I remember. Gorgeous. Dreaming. At rest. Healthy. Excited to see me.
What struck me even more was that she was resting. And, how I long for her to have eternal rest with our Lord. As much as I love seeing her, enjoy her presence, and don’t want to let her go, I long more for her restoration. Most of all, I long for His glory, and if that means more time for her here to accomplish His purposes, I readily agree and accept.
I came across a box of letters and photos the other night, and inside were three letters from my Mom. S walked in the room to find me in tears. I said, “I don’t even remember her anymore.” The letters were fragrant with her love, her fun spirit, her humor and sensitivity. And, they were lavished with her love and concern for me. How I miss that! How long it has been since I’ve sensed that or heard such things from her. And, yet I hear her in some things I say to my girl now. I’m reminded of her ways.
Alzheimer’s is so very long. It tarries. The clock ticks slowly. Come, Lord Jesus. And, remain our steadfast comfort till the end.
Thursday, July 2, 2009
A Dream of Endurance
Early this morning, I had a dream that I was on a long and weary journey. I was greatly discouraged at just how difficult it had all become. I turned the bend, in great hope that the end would soon be in sight, but I saw the opposite. Before me was a great expanse of land: infinite miles; uncounted, unchartered, waiting for me. And my heart sank. I wanted to surrender and go no further. I was done. I had nothing left in me to endure.
I recall waking from the dream, knowing that the way out was actually sooner than I thought. There was some kind of pathway to an underground route taking me back home. But, there was no way of knowing that beforehand. The test of my faith was to endure no matter what I saw ahead.
I think it’s very easy for us to feel this way. Perhaps we’ve pre-scanned and labeled the trials we’d like to endure, and if things do not go according to plan, then our faith will not follow. We’ll abandon ship, or maybe instead sulk for the remainder of the journey.
As Psalm 73 and Romans 5 so clearly indicate, there is maturity gained through our trials. There is trust and encouragement and a depth that is fostered in the well of our hearts. James shares that we are to regard our trials with joy. We’re to look ahead at what may appear to be “bleak” and uncertain circumstances and say, “Thank you, God. Thank you. You know, you are in this, and I can trust you here.” How often do we experience the joy and peace in thanking Him for our trials? He has ordained them for us. He is so wise.
When we round that bend and see the infinite miles that may lie ahead, may we know that the end will result in praising God (1 Peter 1:6-7). And, He will see us through, often with great joy as we focus our eyes on Him.
Let us strive and long to be shaped in the image of Christ. He’s near and very, very good to us! And may we ENDURE.
“And let steadfastness have its full effect,
that you may be perfect and complete,
lacking in nothing.”
(James 1:4)
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